Catholic Community on the Jersey Shore
Catholic Catechism teaches us: 2207 "The family is the original cell of social life. It is the natural society in which husband and wife are called to give themselves in love and in the gift of life. Authority, stability, and a life of relationships within the family constitute the foundations for freedom, security, and fraternity within society. The family is the community in which, from childhood, one can learn moral values, begin to honor God, and make good use of freedom. Family life is an initiation into life in society."
We are in unchartered territory as a culture. Never before have fewer people been active in their religion, with the Millenials abandoning the faith in astounding numbers. This is not good for everyone as simultaneous to this growth of "Nones," or unaffliated, is a significant rise in depression, anxiety, suicide and overdoses. There is a huge hole in too may people's hearts!
We also know that the average age that people report as when they left the faith is 13.
This means that family faith life has been lacking and needs to be rejuvenated; quickly and dramtically!
WARNING: Sending your child to Religious Ed once a week is no match for the 24/7 barage of secular, humanist, often-anti-Christian misinformation that is bombarding him or her at school, on-line, on TV, in music, at the movies, or while playing with friends.
FAITH FORMATION IS A FAMILY AFFAIR!!
14 Questions to About the Family
A 2016 study published in the American Medical Association JAMA Psychiatry journal found that Americans who attended a religious service at least once a week were five times less likely to commit suicide.
HAVE RITUALS- Kids love stability. They are comforted by predictability.
1. Pray before meals, at home and in the world. Let them see YOU pray. A couple I know have the ritual of stopping at 4pm every day and offering a prayer of gratitude. They did it with their children, and they do it with their grandchildren.
2. Have meals together. Make this a priority! It is where so much teaching and learning happens.
3. Keep Sunday Mass vital! This is a very simple and family friendly explanation of the Mass. Make the whole day special! This is the day we dress better, realx, maybe go to a diner! Saturday Mass should be a last and rare resort.
4. Pray with them to their Guardian Angels
READING ALOUD- A family that reads together stays together.
5. Read Bible stories and other virtue building stories
SHARE TIME and ACTIVITIES- Builds lifetime memories and security.
6. Have "down time" without distraction (No Cell Phones!)
7. Play games together. Do puzzles. Watch wholesome, virtuous, movies together.
8. Socialize with other strong, faithful families.
MAKE THEIR JOURNEY REMARKABLE- Kids love moments of awe and wonder.
9. Make Sundays, the Sacraments, Advent, and Lent REALLY special!
10. Do charitable acts as a family, or as parent and child. One couple I know spends one Sunday a month making sandwiches as a family, and delivering them to a shelter.
11. Celebrate the anniversary of their Baptisms and/or their Saint days.
12. Have a Holy Space in the home, and have your home blessed.
13. Bless your children with the sign of the cross as they leave your home for school, for work, or to drive back to their own homes.
BE THEIR ROCK and THEIR LIFESOURCE- Your marriage is the nuclear reactor that fuels the family.
14. Love and laugh often!
15. Set a good example for Christian love and behavior: Express gratitude and forgiveness.
16. Husbands: "Love your wives as Christ loved His Church.." (Ephesians 5:25)
17. Be generous in expalining the faith, its rituals, sacraments, and their importance.
18. Be clear and steadfast in your expectations, loving in your delivery, and compassionate as they journey.
BE AUTHORITATIVE, NOT AUTHORITARIAN (or PERMISSIVE)- My dad would call the family a "benevolent dictatorship."
19. Read this to start: https://parentingscience.com/authoritative-parenting-style/
Helpful website
And this one: IFS
Cautionary tale: How to raise your children to be atheists
Young children respond to beautiful pictures and heroic tales. These books engage the imagination and the mind – and will also draw in older siblings!
In this charming sequel to his bestselling book, Our Lady’s Wardrobe, Anthony DeStefano introduces Catholic children to more well-known images of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Only this time, he doesn’t use Our Lady’s clothes to teach children about the Mother of God, but rather, he gives kids a peek into her own personal “picture book.”
This beautiful collection of poems and pictures introduces young readers to the Communion of Saints in a simple and memorable way. Each page includes an easy to read letter of the alphabet and a charming rhyme about the life of the corresponding saint in heaven.
This Catholic classic, with its gentle illustrations and wise words, tells the story of an unborn baby and its guardian angel . . . a story that will delight all young children, because the journey from conception to birth is their story, too.
These selections make great read-alouds as well as good silent reading for older elementary children.
Vividly and imaginatively illustrated in lavish color, a vintage classic that sold in the countless thousands for two generations is now back in print from Sophia Institute Press. This thin volume includes 23 must-read Bible stories that will captivate the hearts of young children.
The great Andrew Lang brings his story-telling prowess to the lives of the saints! The first Christians to visit Europe and the British Isles met pagans who told tales of fairies, talking beasts, and other wonderful things. To these marvelous stories, they soon added new ones about the Christian saints. Some were true, others improbable, and many simply fantastic. Lang retells these great legends with color and reverence.
You’ll also find here true tales of great saints such as St. Louis of France, St. Vincent de Paul, St. Francis Xavier, and St. Elizabeth of Hungary — souls marked by courage, kindness, and piety.
This book is highly recommended as a family read-aloud throughout the liturgical year – a must-have for a Catholic family library!
Initially written for children, but a delight for grownups as well, these pages show the beauty and holiness that belonged especially to Saint Thomas Aquinas, the man of learning who was also a man of God: the patron saint of all those, young and old, who love the truth with their whole hearts, and who wish to know and serve it well.
BONUS! The author, Raissa Maritain, was the wife of famed Thomistic scholar Jacques Maritain!
Older children need time alone with God and the saints – and books are the perfect way to encourage this! Here are four titles for the pre-teens in your life.
It’s July 1941 in the Auschwitz concentration camp in German-occupied Poland.
Franciscan priest Maximilian Kolbe steps forward.
“Let me take this man’s place,” he says, thereby volunteering to die in the place of a stranger who had just been condemned to death by his Nazi captors.
By means of this singular deed, Fr. Kolbe laid down his life not for his friends — as some might do — but for a complete stranger.
This compelling story, told in graphic novel form, introduces older children to history, the Faith, and the adventure of holiness.
This bold science fiction story casts a young, American Catholic girl as the unlikely protagonist of the plot to save Jesus from Crucifixion. Can she change the future? Should she? This exciting novel asks deep questions, while also bringing ancient Palestine to vivid life.
For every half-dozen heroes antiquity could muster, Christendom produced thousands; and often from the strangest holes and corners. Some of these priests, monks, and martyrs are brought vividly to life in these stories about courageous Christians from the earliest days of Christianity to modern times.
Collection 1, Collection 2, Collection 3, Collection 4, Collection 5
The Saints Chronicles bring vividly to life the stories of courageous Christians from the earliest days of Christianity to modern times. All five volumes of this popular graphic novel series are packed with engaging texts and dramatic images that captivate readers of all ages and inspire them to appreciate and live out more fully their participation in the Mystical Body of Christ.
What can we do? Here is an excellent article: Family is Where Church Begins
Here are common Catholic Prayers
Prayer is vital! Try the Hallow App
We also like the AMEN App
Best Bibles for Catholics: Great Adventure Bible, Revised Standard Version: Catholic Edition.
If you like more traditional language: Douay-Rheims
The Comprehensive Catholic Multimedia Source: EWTN
DO THIS NOW!- Subscribe to The Loop from Catholic Vote: The Loop
Other excellent Catholic commentary worth reading:
National Catholic Register
The Pillar
First Things
The Catholic Thing
Catholic World Report
Crisis Magazine
Epoch Times
World Magazine
Recommended Catholic Apps
FAMILY ENTERTAINMENT AND ACTIVITIES
Bluey
The Tuttle Twins Youtube and The Tuttle Twins Books
Catholic Family Crate
Cultivating Catholics
Catholic Mom Vibes
Catholic Sprouts
5 Sparrows
Video Resources for answering your questions, and your children's:
Catechism: Real and True
Faith and Science: Science Uprising
Faith and Culture Issues: What Would You Say?
Faith, Culture and History Issues: Prager University
Faith and Society: Edify
Wallbuilders has many links and resources, including a Youtube Channel, that present TRUE American History.
BEST WAY TO GROW YOUR FAITH AT HOME- Try these great video-based resources:
Good Reads- Early Stage of Journey
The Beginning Guide to Roman Catholic Faith
Catholics Come Home- Making the Journey Back
Good Reads- Next Stages of Journey
My Catholic Life- RCIA at Home!
Catholic Parents- Resources on the Issues
Meaning of Catholic- Deeper Dive
Marriage Enrichment: Catholic Marriage is the Foundation for Faith and Society.
Mission of the Family: The Mission of the Family is a dynamic new video series that proclaims the truth and beauty of the Catholic vision of marriage and family life in the modern world
BELOVED: Uncover the mystery and meaning of the Sacrament of Marriage
Core Websites for Men:
Engaging the Battle: Into the Breach
Heroic Men Videos- The Netflix for Catholic Men
Fathers of St Joseph- Youtube channel with great inspirational and instructive videos
RISE- Chris Stefanick challenges all men as only he can (explore the Real Life Catholic website)
The King's Men- Mark Houck builds authentic Catholic men
Catholics Come Home- Returning to the Faith
Fraternus- Building Catholic youth and men via outdoor exploration and skills
Dads- Becoming a Godly father
Catholic Dads- Forming men in their faith
Niche Websites for Men:
Catholic Gentleman- Old fashioned manly virtues with Bishop Sheen in the mix.
Wild at Heart- Masculine faith! Love God and Live Free!
2232Men- Men and prayer
Roman Catholic Men- Preparing Men to Battle Evil
Men of Iron- Building men of iron!
Hard as Nails- Men as mentors
Strong Catholic Dads- The title says it all
Meaning of Catholic- The reality of what we are up against
Dynamic Catholic Sacramental Prep makes for great family viewing. Entertaining and informative.
BLESSED FOR KIDS- First Communion
TEENS AND PARENTS- Confirmation Prep
COUPLES- Marriage Enrichment
NEW PARENTS- Baptism
Contact us for more information and resources or to just talk!!
The difference a dad makes in the future of his children is staggering:
THURSDAY, AUGUST 18, 2022
We all know the grim statistics: a mere quarter of Catholics attend Mass each Sunday. Half of those do not believe in the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist. The three-quarters who do not go are essentially unchurched; their understanding of the faith is shaped mostly by childish caricatures and distortions from media and pop culture.
Taking these facts alone, the odds of our children and grandchildren navigating this gauntlet and remaining practicing Catholics are not good, to put it mildly. Kids, as we know, are disproportionately influenced by what their peers do – and do not do. Couple this reality with the fact that nearly all their activities – from their hours on screens to classroom instruction, sports, and extracurriculars – occur with no reference to God. It’s not hard to wonder why kids don’t think religion is “cool” – none of their friends or the people they see in media seem to even think about it.
How can parents keep their kids Catholic in this environment? After God’s grace, the answer, typically, is to lead by example – to show their children how to be faithful by living out your own faith.
That answer is true. Up to a point. We cannot give what we do not have. Kids have a special knack for smelling out authenticity. If we do not believe what we preach, or, worse, if we undermine what we preach by contrary actions (e.g., we follow a household sermon denouncing lying by telling the clerk that our twelve-year-old is really ten so we can get the child discount), our children will see first hand that we are Pharisees who “bind heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on men’s shoulders; but they themselves will not move them with their finger.” (Matt 21:4)
In our culture, being an example in living the faith is not enough. We have often heard the line attributed to St. Francis of Assisi (but probably not his), “Preach the Gospel. If necessary, use words.” Well, words are necessary, very necessary, if our actions are to make sense in an a-religious world unaware of how to understand them.
Our children are bombarded with individualistic, licentious, and anti-religious messaging constantly, far more than we realize. If anyone thinks that an example of praying earnestly at Mass and following the commandments alone will be enough to counteract the world’s seductive powers that flow to our children every waking minute via smartphones, he will be the only one surprised when his children stop going to church.
Fathers, in particular, tend to prefer setting a silent example and passing the duty of explanation to mothers, priests, or teachers. This move might have worked sixty years ago in Catholic neighborhoods, but no longer. Given the tremendous influence that fathers have on children’s religious practice, dads have to take the initiative as children’s first – and most intense – religion teacher.
So, in addition to our example of sincere Christian living, we must teach our children – and teach repeatedly – two kinds of lessons.
First, since the best defense is a good offense, we must constantly point out the falsity of secular dogmas and explain why they are wrong. And it’s never too early to start: a five-year-old can learn that babies should not be harmed in mothers’ wombs; that boys are boys and girls are girls (period); that marriage is between a man and a woman, and that all other arrangements are wrong. All these sins, parading around as secular dogma, transgress nature itself, and children have an intuitive sense that what is natural is normative.
When children reach the appropriate age, parents have to do what they dread: teach the birds and bees. The world has actually helped us by concocting a self-centered and indulgent vision of human sexuality that contrasts sharply with the self-giving and sacrificial vision of the Church. It’s not hard to show how the Church’s deeper vision is more attractive, and there is no shortage of resources available to help us if we are not sure where to start. All it takes is a little time to look for them.
If teaching these topics sounds daunting, consider that many teenagers drift from the faith because they learn through media and in school – in middle school and earlier – that abortion is a women’s right, that gender is a choice, that “love is love.” As they buy into these lies, they will come to see the Church as not only wrong, but as an enemy for opposing a person’s desires. And who wants to follow the enemy’s religion?
The choice is ours: we can teach our children the correct view, or let the world teach them.
The second kind of lesson concerns the faith itself. We have to teach children what we believe, why we believe it, and how faith’s promises exceed those of secular pseudo-dogmas in truth and grandeur. Here, too, there are no shortage of resources to help teach children as they grow from toddlerhood to adulthood. The lessons have to be repeated constantly for them to sink in: think not seven times, but seventy times seven times.
Both kinds of lessons, of course, have a goal that is not simply academic: they help our children form a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. This relationship is the essence of faith, the reason for our existence, our reward in Heaven. This relationship transforms our lives to see ourselves, in the words of the late Gerald Russello, as “warriors and adventurers” in Christ’s army.
And it is this relationship that, as the corrosive allurements of secularism try to seduce them, will keep children Catholic.
https://www.thecatholicthing.org/2022/08/18/forming-warriors-and-adventurers-in-christs-army/
Also, Read this and this
Here is a helpful resource: Catholic Dads
It’s not a stretch to say that the writings of Pope St. John Paul II can fill a library. But for us, one slender volume stands out in a sweeping 26- year pontificate that saw 14 encyclicals, 16 books and thousands of homilies, speeches and addresses. Celebrating 40 years this Nov. 22, the apostolic exhortation Familiaris Consortio (“The Community of the Family”) was characterized by papal biographer George Weigel as one of St. John Paul II’s “personal favorites.” Familiaris Consortio, issued Nov. 22, 1981, has been called a plan of action, a road map and strategy for the Christian family; it is also a forerunner to Pope Francis’ Amoris Laetitia (“The Joy of Love”). This quick read (three hours, give or take) is not only our personal favorite from the saint; it’s a bracing vision that explodes with insights and strategies for the challenges every Christian family faces today. The following is a list of five takeaways that we hope will inspire you to sit down and read the full document — one that might just become one of your personal favorites as well.
1. Your example is where everything starts “The future of humanity passes by way of the family,” wrote Pope St. John Paul II (No. 75). By extension, the future of your family passes by way of … yes, your own personal example. Do our children see us as parents who are leading them consistently and lovingly in prayer? “Only by praying together with their children,” John Paul II writes in a striking passage, “can a father and mother — exercising their royal priesthood — penetrate the innermost depths of their children’s hearts and leave an impression that the future events in their lives will not be able to efface” (No. 60). When life gets difficult — when the inevitable temptations and hardships are encountered by our children — will the “innermost depths” of their hearts bear a permanent, convincing impression of God’s tender care for his people and of our faithfulness in mirroring that care for our children? Please God, yes!
2. You can’t outsource your role as primary educator and first herald “You have asked to have your children baptized,” we heard from the priest at the baptism of each of our children. “In so doing, you are accepting the responsibility of training him/her in the practice of the Faith. … Do you clearly understand what you are undertaking?” “We do,” we answered as parents. But then what? Nature abhors a vacuum, and sadly, too many parents today have — through whatever combination of woundedness, neglect and distraction — created a vacuum of authority and formation. Familiaris Consortio is a wake-up call that no, we are not primarily our children’s chauffeur for curbside drop-off at CCD or Catholic school. In fact, we are the “first and foremost educators” and “first heralds of the Gospel” of our families, which St. John Paul II calls “the first and vital cell of society,” “a school of humanity,” an “educating community,” “the first school of the social virtues,” and a “society in its own original right.”
3. Your family is a ‘Little Trinity’ “Families, become what you are,” John Paul II writes. The family, he continues, is the “living image of God,” “a communion of persons.” To a culture that has forgotten the blueprint for the family, Familiaris Consortio invites us back to the Holy Trinity. Our family is a little icon or image of the Trinity. If each person of the Trinity is focused not on himself, not on material things, but on others, then our family is called to image this other-centered, “self-giving” way of life. As St. John Paul II writes, the “experience of communion and sharing should characterize the family’s daily life.” “As a community of love,” he writes, “it finds in self-giving the law that guides it and makes it grow” (No. 37). Becoming who we are as families, Familiaris Consortio reminds us, means a constant turning toward the Trinity in our daily life.
4. Your family is a ‘Little Church’ If we’re honest, we know that our culture defaults to a thin, reductionist view of “home” as a place to drop our stuff before we run off to the next activity. Our homes easily slip into “entertainment centers” where each member of the family pursues his or her own individual interests. Familiaris Consortio instead outlines the vision for the family’s “church in miniature” or “domestic church.” “The dignity and responsibility of the Christian family as the domestic church,” St. John Paul II writes, “can be achieved only with God’s unceasing aid, which will surely be granted if it is humbly and trustingly petitioned in prayer” (No. 59). Like a majestic cathedral, our homes ought to offer our children an immersive experience in the Faith. A beautiful home altar or prayer corner, icons, a crucifix — these and other visuals, suffused in “a family atmosphere so animated with love and reverence for God,” will help to deepen our families’ “fidelity and intensity of prayer” and “actual participation in the mission of the Church” (No. 62).
5. Your family is on mission If our family is a “communion of persons,” an image of the Trinity, and a “domestic church,” then it only follows that we have been entrusted with what St. John Paul II calls a “missionary task.” “The future of evangelization,” he writes, “depends in great part on the Church of the home” (No. 52). No pressure, Mom and Dad! By “radiating the joy of love” and the “certainty of the hope for which it must give an account,” he writes, “the Christian family loudly proclaims both the present virtues of the Kingdom of God and the hope of a blessed life to come” (No. 52). St. Joseph, Pillar of Families, pray for us! St. John Paul II, pray for us! Soren and Ever Johnson are the founders and directors of Trinity House Community, with a mission “to inspire families to make home a little taste of heaven for the renewal of faith and culture.” Parents of five, they live in Leesburg, Virginia.
We are blessed with four grown children who actively practice their faith. We are often asked, "How did you do it?" We honestly didn't know. So I asked each one, and I even prompted them; "Was it because we had dinners together? Because we sometimes prayed, and often said grace together? Because Mom read you Bible stories? Because we did corporal works of mercy together?" They each pondered and independently said something like this: "All that was important. But the reason I go to Mass and keep that at the center of my life is that I found when I was off to college, travelling the country or the world, living and working on my own, Sunday Mass was the time I could "touch" home, to be united with my family, because I knew my mom and dad, my siblings, would be celebrating the same Mass, hearing the same readings, and receiveng the same Eucharist as me. It's comforting that I have that constant in my life."
Building a Catholic culture at home (the Domestic Church) and crowning it with Sunday Mass are the keys. I think of it like this: